Calling all disabled and elderly and sick people,
This is formal notification that a place has been reserved for you on the Dignitas bus.
We’ve tried to make this as subtle as we can in recent months but let's face it guys, you still keep insisting on seeking expensive hospital treatment, eating, drinking and a warm safe places to live and frankly you cost too much money.
Don’t blame me I’m just the messenger, I don’t make the rules. We've made it as difficult as we can and yet you cling on.We warned you in some of the right wing newspapers that your lifestyle of choice ie. ageing being sick, being disabled was an unwise one but would you listen?
No you would not. You carried on draining the economy of scant resources until we felt we had no choice but to take this to the next level. We simply can’t be spending all our time hounding you with a photographer on your own doorsteps in case you decide to take a walk instead of hiding away. We’re doing our best to galvanise the hate on the streets but again this is taking far too long.
You won’t qualify for insurance when the NHS is fully privatised anyway, so all we’re doing is notching this up a stage to get things much better ordered for the squeezed middle to spread out a bit and for the truly super rich no longer to have even the teeniest doubt that they may be liable for Mansion Tax. The very idea. I know many of you had to sell your homes to pay for your institutionalised care but that’s because you are poor. You can’t expect millionaires to do the same for heavens sake.
Benefits? Schmenefits -it’s taking too damn long with all your marching and whinging and claiming human rights. (we love it when you use that one because we know what’s coming) Anyway enough dithering, time to act.
The buses will be coming and we’d like you on them please lickety split. Well as fast as “you people” can obviously
Don’t bother packing you won’t be needing anything where you’re going.